Bennett

It has been awhile since I have last posted anything. Our life has been a bit CRAZY!! Which has been nice, I had something else to focus on other then "ME". Back in August I took Bennett in for his wellness check up and the doctor noticed something in his left eye. From there we went to see a optamologist. Bennett has developed a cataract.I am gald it wasn't too serious and it can be corrected. Serious what 10 month old has a cataract??? I thought just old people get these. So we made a few trips to see doctors in Salt Lake City and to get the surgery scheduled. He went in for surgery on Sept 29th, had the cataract removed and had a lense implanted. He did amazing! Which I am so thankful for. He will be getting glasses in the next month or two.

TREATMENT 5

I can finally see the light at the end of tunnel. I can't belive it's coming up soon NUMBER 6! Seriuos it have been 4 almost 5 months that I have started chemo. I can't belive it. I thought the end was never going to be in sight. But it's here!!! I just got treatment #5 last Thursday. Sept 23rd, can you come any quicker???

I can't believe it has been over a month since I have blogged. Life for us has been a bit crazy. I had my #4 treatment on August 12. Number 4,5, and 6 chemo has changed so I really didn't know what I was up against. BOY! it was a lot different than the first three. I was a perfectly fine for two days, than it hit me. I was extremely tired and my body ached. I felt as though I was coming down with the flu. I just felt horrible. This lasted for almost a week. My white blood count was low, so that really explained was I was feeling off. I am glad that one is over.

This is how I have been feeling the last couple of Weeks. I have been going stir CRAZY. It seems as though we haven't done anything and it's been driving me nuts. The weather is too HOT and to be honest I haven't been feeling that great to take them out anywhere all by myself. I feel like July has just passed me by and I love July. It has always been one of my favorite months, because of the holidays. This July has been the pits. I have been sort of depressed, lately. I wonder if Chemo has this side effect??? I will have to ask the doc, next time I'm in. My mind is constantly on my next treatments, how many more, how many more weeks, I wish September 23rd would come quick, my hair(lack of), if I look stupid in my wig, to people notice it's a wig, my surgery, when to have surgery, how long is recovery, how will I look....really the list of questions goes on. I can't stand it anymore. I need this to be all over and I wish it would come fast!!!! I want my life back!!! I want to be feel normal, again. Will I ever feel normal??? I needed to take a break and focus on something different. Brett and I decided that I needed to go up north and visit family. I packed up the kid on Tuesday and headed out. I have been here for 24 hours and I am feeling so much better. My family has kept me busy. It's been so nice and realaxing. The kids have swam, played with cousins, watched movies, manicures, pedicures, been shopping, trips in the car, ice cream, diet coke runs,, hot dogs, junk food, visits from Karissa and Chaddy, and jumping on the tramp. Next on the lsit Cascade Springs. This has been a much needed break! Although I still worry about my hair and cancer, I have joked and laughed about it with my family. I miss Brett, but we're having FUN!!!

What cancer cannot do
Cancer is so limited...
It cannot cripple Love
It cannot shatter Hope
It cannot corrode Faith
It cannnot destroy Peace
It cannot kill friendship
It cannot suppress Memories
It cannot silence Courage
It cannot invade the Soul
It cannot conquer the Spirit.

I never really thought that I would go completely bald, like Mr. Clean. Well guess what?? I am on my way there. After one good scrub of my scalp this is what happen.

I went from that...

to this

Can I just tell you how yesterday felt????? It really was wonderful! My friend, Liz, and I took the kids to the pool. Went to Cafe Rio for lunch. Than headed over to the Library to check out some books and movies. I felt like a normal person. I didn't think twice about the scarf on my head and my baldness underneath, maybe because I am getting use to it. We didn't talk cancer (I don't mind talking about it, it just never came up in conversation) and for a few hours I had forgotten that I had it. The day didn't end there. Brett got home from work and we head to the lake with my niece, Karissa, her boyfriend, and the kids. We tubed, wake boarded, and let the kids play on the beach. It was a fun filled day. I need more days like this.